And on the way to the market Jack met a big bad wolf.

The wolf growled and growled and growled.

Then, he growled again.

The wolf asked, "What ya got in the basket there kid?"

Jack answered, "I've got a hamburger-French-fries-an-a-malt."

And the wolf replied, "A hamburger-French-fries-an-a-malt!!?"

Mmmmmm, I love a hamburger-French-fries-an-a-malt."

Jack hesitated, "Well..."

And the wolf offered, "Hey, I'll give ya some magic beans for the basket and the cow."

Jack complained, "I don't like magic beans."

So the wolf growled again. "Then I'll give ya some magic marbles."

And Jack yelled, "Yeah!" (Because everybody knows that magic marbles are better than magic beans).

The wolf gave Jack the magic marbles and Jack gave the wolf the cow and the basket and he ran home.

Jack ran and ran and ran and ran.

When he got home he started to huff and puff and huff and puff and huff and puff, but he couldn't blow the house down because it was made of bricks.

So Jack climbed up to the roof and jumped on top of the chimney and slid down into the house.

When he got into the house, he looked around and found three bowls of porridge. He went over to the first bowl and tasted it and screamed,

Ahhhhhhhhh!

It was too hot.

So Jack went over to the next bowl and tasting it chattered in a chilly way, "Gerrrrrrrrrrr!"

"It's much too cold!"

Then Jack went over to the third bowl and tasted it and licked his lips, "Mmmmmm."

"This is just right!""

Suddenly, the door opened and in walked Jack's mother.

"Jack, what are you doing?"

Jack exclaimed, "Mother, I've got some magic marbles."

Jack's mother gasped, "Marbles!" She grabbed them from Jack and threw them out the window.

Later that night, Jack fell fast asleep. He snored and he snored and he snored. His mother gently opened the door to see what all the noise was about and tip toed in.

"Jack," she whispered. "What a big nose you have."

Jack opened his eyes and scrunched up his face. "Oh that's all the better to smell the porridge with."

His mother observed, "Oh, Jack, what a big beanstalk you have."

And Jack answered, "That's all the better to climb up the..."

And, with that, Jack quickly leaped out the window and started to climb up the beanstalk.

He climbed and climbed and climbed and climbed and went higher and higher and higher and higher until he got to the top of the beanstalk where he realized he couldn't go any higher.

He looked around and saw a great big castle and yelled, "Hey Rapunzel, let down your golden hair! And, Rapunzel let down her golden hair.

Then Jack began to climb up her golden hair and when he got into the castle he saw three bears.

The poppa bear barked, "Who's been taking my golden goose that lays golden eggs?

And the momma bear demanded, "Who's been taking my golden goose that lays golden eggs?

And the baby bear squealed, "Who's been taking my golden goose that lays golden eggs?

And Jack yelled, "I've got the golden goose that lays the golden eggs"

Quickly, Jack grabbed the goose as the goose suggested, "Jack, I think it's time to relocate!"

Jack ran and he ran and he ran and he ran.

And, then the giant ran and ran and ran and ran and Jack ran and ran and ran and the giant ran and Jack ran and the giant ran and Jack slid down the bean stalk and he scored a touchdown and got six points and got to keep the golden goose!

Soon after, Jack bought his mother a beautiful house and his mother introduced him to her hairdresser who happened to be a frog. After dating for several months, Jack finally kissed the frog and it turned into a beautiful princess whose name was Jill.

A week later, Jack and Jill went up the hill and put a down payment on a house.

And then Goldie Lox and the Seven Dwarfs moved in next store and everyone lived happily, ever after.